April 18, 2018

HOW TO: Text A Guy And Maintain Your Sanity.

Heeello, everyone!

I get it, you're excited! You finally met a guy that is not a total jerk and you're really into him. So into him that waiting for him to respond to your texts has become unbearable. You don't want to play games, but you also don't want to seem too available or not available enough. Maybe you sent a text along the lines of "hey, are we still on for tonight?" and it's been six hours. Nothing. Radio silence.  

That situation is going to bother any girl or guy in the world. No one likes to be ignored, but we've been ignored before and I'd go as far as saying that we've been the ones ignoring someone before. The only thing we can do (much like in every situation in life) is to control our actions. We can start freaking out and assuming the worst or we can put our big girl pants on and face the situation like the boss ladies we are. I know texting a guy and remaining sane sound like two things that don't really go together, but - trust me - I promise you they do. 
ONE // Focus on other things.
The best things to do in these situations is to FIND SOMETHING ELSE TO DO. You're a busy lady, I'm pretty sure you're able to find an errand that needs to be crossed off you're to-do list or a book to read. Or maybe you can rely on less productive methods such as binge watching Crazy Ex-Girlfriend or catching up on all the youtube videos on your subscription box. Regardless of what you choose, try to find something that really engages your brain, that's why I suggested running errands or reading a book. Writing blog posts helps too.

TWO // Remind yourself you're a catch too. 
When we're waiting for someone to text us back we're in this anxiety inducing situation that usually ends up with us questioning our worth or putting someone on a pedestal. Yes, he's cute, he has a job, he surfs (according to IG) and he's just overall perfect for you. But, guess what? You're a catch. You're hot, you workout, your friends say you're funny, you also have job and you care about others.. When you enter this self-doubting vibe, remind yourself of all the positive things that you are. If he can't see it, you're probably better off without him.

THREE // Text a friend. 
True friends get you. They want to help and they will be more than happy to chat with you for a few minutes to get your mind off things. And honestly.. we've all been there. We've all been left on "read"  or completely ignored. But the thing is that you also need to remind yourself that texting someone  you're interested in cannot be the center of your day - ever. You need to get busy, stay productive and only allow yourself a few breaks in between to think about the "texting situation". Some people truly have busy schedules. I only check my phone in the morning, during my lunch time and when I'm leaving work, for example. I don't work with my phone on my desk and even when I do (for work purposes) I don't have time to answer, plain and simple. So, call your friend when you have the urge to send 5 texts in a roll.  

FOUR // Lower your expectations.
A lot can be misinterpreted or lost in context when you're texting, so chill out. Take as many chill pills as you need before texting your guy and don't overanalyze the things that he says. I know this is hard when you're super interested in someone, I know it's easy to get caught up on every word and try to find meaning where there's none. So, take a deep breath and take things as they go. I'm not saying you should lower your standards, but don't send him a fun meme on a Saturday afternoon hoping that the conversation will end with him asking you out that night because guys are not that clever when it comes to dating. They don't take hints. So, instead of sitting there hoping he'll magically read your mind, take action. If you want to go out with him, you should let him know. Be chill about it, like "hey, I'm not doing anything tonight. Do you want to maybe grab something to eat?"

FIVE // If you can't send it and forget, don't send it. 
The best advice I can give you when it comes to texting a member of the opposite sex is: send it and forget it. At the end of the day, your sanity and peace of mind is way more important than any guy. I know it's easier said than done, but when the right guy comes along he won't be jerk. He won't play ''texting games" and you won't have to take screenshots of the ambiguous things he says and send it to your friends because he will say what he means and he will let you know that he's interested in you. And you know what? He should because you're a catch and he's the one who should be scared of loosing you to the next guy.

That's all the "advice" I have for today! Let me know on the comments if you agree or disagree with my tips, I love chatting with you - specially about dating. I feel like we've all been through similar situations and this is just how I, being a super single 25 year-old, am dealing with it. The important thing is to not let the waiting for someone else to answer a text be the center of your day or completely take over your life for a few days. You were complete before you met that person and you still is. You don't need someone's answer to move on with your day. 

Are you currently on a similar situation?
Do you have any tips for us?

Let's chat!

Thanks so much for reading and come back soon!

April 16, 2018

What I'm Decluttering This Week.

Happy Tuesday!

I know this is going to sound weird, but I love to start the week by getting rid off stuff. It very freeing and it makes me feel like I'm accomplishing something, which I am. Learning about minimalism and how much decluttering my space can help my mental health has really changed my life. I'm able to worry less about stuff and focus my time and energy (and attention) on more important things, like my family, my friends, my job and my goals. 

Today I was inspired by this book I'm currently reading (actually listening to) called Goodbye, Things by Fumio Sasaki. He talks a lot about the fact that your stuff is not just sitting there occupying space. The things you surround yourself with are actually sending you messages that clutter up your brain. For example, that bag with the broken zipper in your closet is constantly sending the message of "fix me please" everything you pass through it and all these thoughts clutter up your mind like crazy. These to-do errands and unused items are not worth the mental clutter, in my opinion, so I decided to just go through my bedroom and just let a bunch of things go!
The hardest thing for me to get rid off this week, believe it or not, was that blue folder. I have a thing with school supplies and I kept that particular folder for so long because I honestly thought I was going to use it one day.. Well, that day never came so I'm decluttering it now. When it comes to organizers, containers and even folder, I think it's best to just let them go because if you keep it, chances are you're going to find something to put in it and that's how things pile up in your house. 

We also have some workout DVDs. I don't even have a way of watching them now - I don't own a TV anymore and my computer doesn't have the little thing to insert cds, so there was really no point in keeping them. Up next we have a bunch of miscellaneous things, like: a cup I got at a festival, a little Madrid souvenir notebook, an old pen drive I stole from an old boyfriend (there was absolutely no reason for me to hold on to it), old earbuds that don't work anymore and an old iPhone case. I used to have an insane amount of iPhone cases and that was basically money down the drain - they were cheap, so they didn't protect my phone and they were all basically coming apart after a month of use. Lesson learned: no more Forever21 phone cases for me. 

That's everything I have for today, guys. Hopefully this inspired you to get started on your spring cleaning and maybe do a little decluttering yourself. After trying out the Minimalist Challenge I've realized that the more I get rid off, the easier it is to let things go. So, if you feel discouraged or if you're finding it too hard to let things go, just relax and keep going - baby steps. It truly does get easier and you just need to keep at it, it's worth it. 

What are you decluttering this week?

Let's chat!

Thanks so much for reading and come back soon!


HOW TO: Not Spend Money // No Spending Challenge.


Heeeello, everyone!

In a capitalist world, not spending any money - even for a day - is already a huge accomplishment. If you play close attention, almost everything around us is propelling us to consume: the billboards we pass on our way to work, the comercial breaks on TV (now we even have them on youtube) and the way products are places at stores.

So, today I wanted to share with you guys some tips and tricks I've picked up ever since I started the No Spend Challenge a couple of months ago. These might sound very silly or even obvious to some of you, but I think sometimes it helps to hear the obvious from a different person in order for it to really sink in. 

ONE // Do not enter a store. 
This is number one because it is the most important one, the rest of the tips are all equally important but this one is key. The best way to not give in to temptation is to try to eliminate it. Alcoholics don't hang out in bars and weight watchers don't have their meetings on Dunkin Donuts, right? Therefore, if you don't want to spend money, DON'T HANG OUT AT THE MALL. Plain and simple. Ever since I started this challenge I've been avoiding the mall like the plague and that has really helped me out. If your biggest problem is online shopping, block the usual website you shop at on your browser and unsubscribe from email lists. You can't want something or be tempted by it if don't even know it exists. 

TWO // Never have extra money on your wallet.
This is a tough and kinda dangerous one because emergencies do happen and cash does solve a lot of problems, but it's something that has really helped me. I usually have my debit card with me and around  20 bucks - more like reais 'cause I live in Brazil and that's our currency but you get the point: I have a small amount of cash. That amount allows me to get a bit of gas on my car if I'm running really low and need to get home or maybe take a cab home if something happens to my car, things like that. It's my emergency money and I only really spend it on emergencies, I've had the same 20 bucks on my wallet since last December. For everything else I use my debit card, I just find it easier to control through my bank app and I'm able to see the big picture: how much money I still have on my account for that month. And that's another thing, as soon as I get my salary I transfer everything I want to save to my savings account and then I only allow myself to spend what's left on my checking account that month. 

THREE // Find a free hobby. 
Find a hobby that doesn't require you to buy anything and replace shopping with said hobby. Mine is blogging, but there are thousands of other things you could do, like: start a youtube channel, read (libraries have books available for free), go for a walk, start doing yoga. Literally guys, the possibilities are endless. 

FOUR // Appreciate the things that you have.
Whenever I feel like I don't have anything to wear I rearrange my closet. I don't go through everything right then and there, but I do a quick once over and challenge myself to think of new outfits I could put together and I also pull to the front the things that I haven't worn in a while. I've been decluttering and minimizing for three years now and I still have a reasonably big wardrobe, so a couple of things still get lost in the mess. Also, if you feel the urge to shop for makeup or cosmetics in general, you can "shop your stash", which is basically the same process I just explain but you focus on your makeup "collection" instead. It's really easy to take things for granted when you have too much, habits like this help you to not only save money but to also center yourself by being grateful for your belongings. 

FIVE // Learn to invest.
One of the things that keeps me on track with this challenge is learning what I can actually do with a large savings account. Like, learning how much money I earn by investing it properly or how much money I would need for a down payment on a house (and how fast I can get there) and things like that. Big long-term rewards (like a house) outweigh the fast and short-term rush I would get from buying a t-shirt. So, every time I feel the urge to shop or to "treat myself" to a latte I think: do I prefer a latte now or a house in a couple of years? I know this is a bit far-fetched, I mean.. you can have a coffee and still buy a house in the future, but every dollar (euro, pound..) counts towards your end goal. 

That's all the wisdom I have for you today. Hopefully this post was helpful to you. I know we all make different incomes and we're all working with a different budget, but I truly believe the majority of people can benefit from these tips. Let me know on the comments if you have any money saving tips to share with us. And also, if you feel like joining in on the No Spend Challenge, you're more than welcomed to do so. 

Do you have any tips on how to save money?

Let's chat!

Thanks so much for reading and come back soon!